Rants of a somewhat distorted mind: The big 6-0

I cannot believe that in 3 weeks’ time, I’m turning SIXTY!!!!



I’ll say this about age, it’s never really bothered me I was getting older…. until THIS UPCOMING ONE!



When I was a kid, growing up in the Philippines, every birthday was a big deal for me; it meant birthday cake, a party, birthday cards, and PRESENTS! Woo hoo! Of course, I’d wished my birthday was also a significant day so that I’d feel a little more special about myself (self-esteem issues at the age of 6… go figure). That wasn’t gonna happen.



Later, as I was in my teens, birthdays meant birthday cake, party, cards, presents, and COLD HARD CASH (the mercenary in me was evolving). And, I discovered my birthday wound up becoming a significant day after all when the Philippines changed Filipino Independence Day from July 4 to MY HAPPY DAY! Who’d a thunk it?!



Now, as in anyone else’s life, there were those landmark birthdays that meant something: the 16th (I can drive on my own!), 18th (I’m an ADULT!), 21st (I can now legally drink… that’s the age in Florida), 25th (my car insurance rates drop), and then the requisite 30th, 40th, 50th, and so on, and so on. For me, getting older was something to celebrate, not to dread. And, of course, with each and every one came the cake, party, cards, presents and, again, the cash. I was still a tad materialistic.



However, in my later years, the birthdays didn’t seem to matter as much with the celebration and not even the presents OR the money. It evolved into a quiet celebration for me, and the past few years I just wanted to do whatever I felt like doing. Parties, cards, presents, even the cash held less allure for me. It was just cool to know there were significant events tied to my birthday (other than Filipino Independence, that is); a former President and I sharing the same birthdate, for one.



But this one, the big six-zero… I gotsta admit, this one’s getting to me. Not that I don’t want to turn that age, I couldn’t avoid it even if I tried. Yeesh. But SIXTY??? Man, I’m turning into a fossil. I’m so old, I crap dust. I was born back in the days when music was played on turntables, some of ‘em rotating at 78rpm!! TV was just becoming popular, and it was mostly black and white. Computers? What’s that? Mobile phones, iPads, laptops… HAH! We’d just as soon send a man to the moon before we come up with stuff like that!



Perhaps it’s because that’s only 5 years before the “mandatory age for retirement” (not that I’m gonna be retiring any time soon, since I work for myself). Or that the whippersnappers behind the box office windows charge me the senior rate when I go to catch a movie. Or that my body’s creaking and aching in places I never knew could make me feel this old. See, when you get older, your body doesn’t recover as quickly as it used to when you were in your 20s and 30s.



Oh, well. I guess that’s how the fortune cookie crumbles. Oh, look, I got mail from AARP about renewing my membership.



Can we say decrepit? I dunno what it is about this birthday, but I’d just as soon start aging backwards, if you don’t mind. Before you know it, I’ll wind up sleeping like a baby: waking up every two hours and peeing in my diapers!