This morning, while making my (first) cappuccino, I glanced out the window and saw our dog sitting in the neighbor's yard, staring at me through the gate with a furrowed brow. I thought to myself, "How strange... She doesn't even HAVE brows!" And then I called to the husband to let her back in the house.
Me: "Look at her, she's miserable. She probably has allergies!"
Him: *Laughs* "She's fine."
Me: "How do you know?"
Just then, the neighbor's dog walked up and started sniffing around near her lady parts. "There's Sammy," I advised; relieved that I was human. "Good," replied the husband, "She can stay out there now. I'm getting in the shower."
When I came back over to make my second cup of joe, I noticed that our dog had not left her position at the gate. By now the husband was finished getting ready, so I walked into the bedroom to advise him of this news.
Me: "She hasn't moved an inch. She's probably screaming at you for locking her up in the yard with a Sweetgum tree." *Mimics dog allergy*
Him: *Laughs* "She'll live."
Me: "Yeah, but she knows where we keep the knives and I'm pretty sure she's not going to use them on ME!"
Maybe next time, he'll think twice before polluting her head with all that pollen. But just in case, I'm going to go ahead and bump up the coverage on that life insurance policy!